The Greatest Showman - Chapter 2230

[Two thousand one hundred and ninety-three sleepless]

” Knock

knock.” ” Knock knock.” A soft knock

on the door rang in the quiet early morning hours. There seemed to be some problem with a lamp at the end of the corridor, flickering on and off, and the filament could be faintly heard burning. The sound of the building more and more brings out the emptiness and length of the whole corridor. These old buildings with a long history can always smell a little old and dilapidated. The air vents coming out of nowhere make the air cool and swish. .

“Crack.”

The light at the end of the corridor still failed to last until the end, so it went out.

The brightly lit corridor dimmed a little, and although the other lamps were still bright, it inevitably gave rise to a feeling that the light was gradually dissipating, and the surroundings became more and more quiet.

Matthew couldn’t help but raised his head and looked at the extinguished lamp. He could vaguely see a moth lying dead in the lampshade without any movement. , the two sides perished in this way.

This made Matthew’s eyelids start to twitch inexplicably.

“Knock knock.”

Matthew retracted his gaze, knocked on the door again, but got no response. He looked down at the gap under the door, the light leaked out, and it was quiet and peaceful, but it didn’t go out.

Without further hesitation, Matthew tried the door handle, but found that the door was not locked, so he pushed open the door directly, “Renly?” with the script and pages, and an empty coffee mug next to it.

Matthew’s heart began to sink.

Push open the bathroom, no one; push open the balcony, no one.

The whole room was just that big, and there was no way to hide anyone, so Matthew could be sure that Renly wasn’t there.

After looking around for a week, Matthew noticed something abnormal: in the ashtray on the coffee table, there was an unlit cigarette that had been thrown away; there were no cigarette cases and lighters beside it.

Matthew made some guesses, and quickly left the room, not forgetting to bring the door of the room, and then walked quickly towards the roof of the top floor.

Pushing open the rooftop door, the dark night sky spreads out in front of you, and the vaguely rolling hills appear on the horizon like smudged ink, but only a few strokes outline a touch of grandeur and grandeur, even if There are no stars in the sky, and my heart suddenly opens up.

In the boundless night, a figure was sitting on the edge of the balcony, and the

strong wind blew the hem of his shirt, as if he might go away at any time.

Matthew let out a long sigh of relief, which made him feel a little relieved.

Whenever Renly needed to quiet down and think, he would always find a noisy and quiet corner to sit down. He used to choose the supermarket. If he couldn’t find Renly, he would always find it in the corner of the supermarket; But as Renly’s popularity and awareness gradually rose, supermarkets became less “safe”, which meant that Renly had to find other harbors.

They are now trapped in the small town of Snim. Compared with the forest, the rooftop is a more convenient choice, and it should be the only reasonable choice.

So, Matthew walked quickly to the rooftop, and sure enough, he saw the familiar figure-in an instant, an illusion occurred in his mind, the time and space were dislocated, and it seemed that when he returned to Eton College again, he saw the blue on the rooftop. The other side of the ceremony.

That kind of loneliness, that kind of loneliness, that kind of fragility… Usually it always settles between the shallow smiles in the eyebrows, almost no one can detect it, but it always exists objectively, and it always lingers, as if there is no one out of nowhere. The drowning man who was crying for help, the silent roar concealed the gradually suffocating ashes, slowly and slowly swallowing the faint and bright rays of light around the soul.

After last year’s “Boom Drummer” was finished, the gloom that followed him seemed to finally be gone, completely gone, not even when Paul Walker got into a car accident, it was as if Renly had finally gotten rid of the nightmare, but now, Shadows began to quietly emerge again.

Matthew stepped forward quickly, but when he was about to approach, he couldn’t help slowing down: he was a little flustered, lest his footsteps would disturb Renly, but he didn’t expect that Renly’s joking voice came from the wind. “Don’t worry, I don’t have the courage to jump, I just need to be calm.”

The joke at this time made Matthew unable to laugh.

But the footsteps landed firmly on the ground again, and then sat down beside Renly.

“Many people say that it is the weak who commit suicide because they are too afraid and too cowardly, so they have chosen a hundred; but I have a different idea, in fact, they are all brave, because they have the courage to make a decisive farewell— —Farewell with a complete turn around. The courage they possessed is far beyond imagination.”

Renly’s voice was erratic in the wind, which made Matthew’s heart skip a beat.

His eyelids twitched more and more.

“She has the courage I’ll never have,” Renly whispered.

Matthew knew who this “she” was, “You know this sentence is wrong.”

Renly didn’t affirm or deny, just looked up at the stars, “Don’t worry, really, I’m just reading the script until I get tired. , it takes a cigarette to wake up. I’m just… heh, I’m just tired.” Renly had the pack of cigarettes and lighters in his left hand, and a cigarette in his right, but it didn’t light, The tired voice was full of self-deprecation.

“It’s a beautiful night in Ireland. I can’t help but imagine that I’m running barefoot above the forest treetops, as if my soul can fly.” Renly took a deep breath, the fresh and cold air The air filled his chest, and his whole body seemed to be much lighter, “Wow, it would be wonderful if time stopped forever.”

“…Renly, you need to rest.” Matthew said in a deep voice .

Renly paused for a moment, then laughed cheerfully, “Ha, I know, I have a rest every day, but, the work is really too busy, so I can only work overtime, otherwise, the filming progress of the crew will be lost. It’s about to stop, believe me, Ogus will never have a good face.”

“Renly, I’m serious.” Matthew didn’t buy it at all. “The crew doesn’t have that much work at all, as you know I know. You’re lying to yourself!”

Renly’s smile stopped at the corner of his mouth, his expression slightly slightly stiff.

Matthew couldn’t bear it, and his tone slowed down a little, “Renly, you need to rest, your current state is not good, very bad, you will collapse at any time. You… you need to sleep well, you need to let Pull yourself together…you haven’t closed your eyes for three days, that’s not normal. You’re…very, very tired right now, and a little accident could be…listen, you need to rest, you just need to rest.”

“I I know!” Renly interrupted Matthew roughly, “I will, I will rest. I will go back and finish the script, and I will rest.”

Those perfunctory words made Matthew tough again. “Renly, I’m serious, you’re in a terrible state! You should be sensible and smart enough to know the consequences of this…”

“Yes, I know, I know all about it!” Renly turned his head, viciously Staring at Matthew, his voice became hard and cold, and a powerful voice burst out, “I know all about it, but I know the consequences, but I still persuade her to go to the front line, I know what might happen, but Still didn’t stop her. It’s me, you know? It’s me! I’ve always been like that, pretending to be smart, pretending to be wise to know everything, pretending to be God and directing other people’s lives, but in fact, what am I? I don’t know. I really don’t know anything.”

Matthew opened his mouth slightly, “Renly, it’s not your fault…”

“Then whose fault is it? Tell me, I’m to blame! Charles, Should I blame me? It’s not me, so who the hell is it? You tell me that if I can’t blame someone, I’m probably going to go crazy, you know? I have to do it, I have to distract myself. Renly’s bloodshot eyes were full of anger and despair, staring at Matthew in the dark, question after question.

Matthew couldn’t answer.

“You know what? I can’t do it, I can’t close my eyes, I can’t stop thinking, just a little bit of time and I’ll start imagining what’s going on there! She’s suffering right now What! What is she facing now! Even if she’s still alive, she’s not in a good position, is she? How could she be okay? As long as I close my eyes, I’ll see her covered in blood , I can’t do it, Charles, I really can’t do it.”

Renly’s words were falling apart, the kind of wound deep into the bone, dripping with blood showing his vulnerability and pain.

After tearing off the mask, it was exposed like this.

“I know, I’m a coward, I just hide in the set, pretend the world is peaceful, pretend nothing is crazy, and use work to numb my nerves! And she’s fighting for her life! How absurd! How absurd! Ridiculous! But what’s even more sad is that I can’t help anything, you understand? I can’t…I can’t help…I can’t miss her, but I can’t miss her…I I don’t know what to do.”

“I have to keep busy, keep my brain spinning, and not take a break; I have to blame someone and let my anger go out, or I’m not sure I’m going to Do what. I…I can’t stop, understand? I can’t stop. It’s like…I don’t know, it’s like stop, it’s all going to fall apart, everything I’m holding on to, what I’m trying to do is going to be all Collapse!”

“Heather is the disease, Paul is the accident, so what about Edith? Edith is me, I’m the one who caused it all, I can see blood on my hands, you understand? I hate it My own reason, and I hate my own cleverness, but I’m actually just a big fool.”

“Charles, what should I do?”

Renly looked at Matthew with desperate eyes like this, which completely broke Matthew’s heart. —He, can’t help, he can’t help at all.

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[End of this Chapter]